I have question for you. It's been bothering since you left me behind to return to your life. Yes, left. Left my in uncertainty, you left my life upside down. You left me not knowing what to do with this ache in my chest that started the moment you climbed in your bakkie to return home.
You say I am fast and that you are slow. But my question is: Do your eyes know that you are slow? Do you know that your lips say you are slow, but that your eyes say the complete opposite? Do you know that your eyes tell me that I'll be safe with you and that I can trust you?
When I raise my concerns you laugh at me. This scares me, it makes me feel like a small child sitting in a dark room waiting for the monsters to come. Do you know how fragile my heart is? Can you take care not leave a crack in it's fine porcelain surface.
I have spent years building my walls. I fortified my heart, because I do not want the hurt. Do you know that without even trying you somehow found a way in? You penetrated my defenses despite my best attempts to keep you out. I do NOT want this! I want to be able to protect my heart from the hurt, but I find that I no longer hold it, you do.
So mister, find out what you need to know. But I beg of you not to give me that look of yours with its unspoken promises. Not until your lips and eyes speak the same language and you know exactly what you want.
Until then take care of my heart.
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