There is nothing as earth shattering as losing a loved one. I lost my mom about 2 months ago. It happened suddenly and was devastating. One moment she was here the next she was gone. It is still not quite sunk in yet.
I do not know how to put words to the feelings that are tearing up my insides. I am left with so many questions and regrets. Then there is the longing, a long so great that I want to curl up and die. A gaping hole that seem to have no end.
Oh, I know that she is now safe from the cruelty of the world, but I am selfish, I want her l here with me. I want to hold her and hear say she loves me. I want see her nagging my brother, who seems so lost without her. I want to be able to pick up the phone to call her and not have to stop midway when I realize that she won't be on the other end of the line.
I don't want to face the fact that she will never be here ever again. She will not be there when I fall in love, she will not be at my wedding, she will not meet my children and my children will not have the privilege of knowing the sweetest, most caring grandmother any child would ever have the pleasure of knowing.
I want to scream at the heavens, because I am now left to pick up the pieces of my broken heart and console my loved ones.
Okay, before some idiot complains about the sob story, fine, I know I'm not the first person to loose someone. But don't you dare minimize my pain. Losing my mom has been the worst thing that has ever happened to me.
